Broward Blind Items – Bet You’ll Never Guess Who They Are!

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Broward Blind Items are back again. Who knew that anyone read these things?

Little did I know how much fun readers found this column until I started receiving emails begging me to reveal the answers. Thanks to all my secret sources for sharing their silly social and political experiences!

Now for some new gossip:

While Caroline Kennedy was visiting Tamarac, she only shook hands with the few that were lucky enough to be in the front row of the crowded venue before she was whisked away by her handlers. One of those was Chief Charlie, candidate for Broward County Sheriff. When Kennedy spied his campaign name tag, she stopped and said, “Hello Sheriff!” A flattering faux pas indeed!

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Shifty is a local Democrat big wig who also consults local politicians. He’s notorious for being on the lazy side and not exposing his politicians to the people he says he will. In fact, if you aren’t satisfied with his halfhearted job, you’re up a creek because he absolutely will go coconuts and use his influence to turn people against you until you pay him. Problem is, these candidates don’t want to raise a stink and hurt their campaign. Somebody needs to show Shifty the door, or demote this disastrous conflict of interest!

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I’m so sad. I’ve been played for such a fool! Finding out that I’ve been tricked by someone that’s supposed to protect and serve me yada yada. Not only have I been tricked, but thousands of people that fell for this scheme have as well. You see, the Grande Capo himself doesn’t exist in social media! You heard it right here, the man behind the curtain is Billy Bucks, host of his own self-sponsored “Money Show” on the radio. Capo has hired Billy to be his alter ego. Don’t be fooled out there, the Wizard of Oz’s social presence is all smoke and mirrors!

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Speaking of Billy Bucks, since his show has so little listeners, and the station doesn’t want to confirm the hard truth by having Arbitron measure their local audience, Billy is having Facebook socials at a local restaurant and inviting all of his listeners to truly see if anyone, well…Listens! The sad truth is, after two events and dismal showings, it looks like maybe people aren’t listing to Billy after all. One source told me that last week, they accidentally joined his small group at the restaurant mistakenly thinking it was Paul Politico’s election event. When they realized they were at the wrong party, Billy Bucks told them there were only four other people at Paul’s event and not to bother going over. They stayed put over on Billy’s side and were upset to find out that they had been hoodwinked! (Billy, just to set the record straight, the sign-in sheet shows there were 35 people plus two Mayors at that other event.) Anyway, maybe the third time will be the charm for your big party, Billy.

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Lucky Louis is not feeling the love after he left a Tamarac Commission meeting. Seems as though he went to ask for advice for his fledgling campaign and thought the best person would be Katy Kingspoint. Well, Katy got right to the point and told him point-blank that he didn’t stand much of a chance of winning because he had an “R” next to his name. Ouch!

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Broward Official Tracy Skittles was all thumbs this week when she accidentally dropped her iphone in the toilet after slicing her finger. Some vacation she had! Tracy: getting rid of the addictive phone while on vacation may have been a good thing, right? Well, next time this happens, try to stick your iphone in rice overnight and it will work again.

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Memorial Day is a day to remember all of those that fought for our country…..or is it a day to go to solemn services and solicit votes? Some Broward candidates in Coral Springs and Tamarac may have mistaken Memorial Day Services as a great opportunity to solicit new voters by wearing conspicuous campaign shirts or by handing out their palm cards to veterans. A few candidates showed more dignity with their low-key presence. After all, this day was truly about our veterans and not about garnering votes.

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